Tim Ferriss
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October 6th, 2021
- statement against interest is one of the fastest ways to build trust
- statement against interest = saying something you wouldn't say if you were totally self-centred
- shift from blame to joint contribution (to problem)
- 2 key elements of apology
- own own role
- recognize the impacts
- > if you feel you need to add something, might be:
- impact on you isn't acknowledged
- she's not owning her agency
- you want her to know you had good intentions
- Tim > ~ I tell her I'm not asking for an apology, but that makes it worse
- (I would say that he could do well to acknowledge that she can't trust that he's not asking for an apology)
February 16th, 2021
- like why hasn't he gone all the way?
- various hypotheses for this:
- he doesn't believe it's possible, somehow?
- like his implicit model of how how far you can go doesn't include that
- he thinks it would be bad
- eg that it's important to retain some amount of triggerableness to be more able to relate with his patients/clients/etc
- panic is probably for infants and IFS doesn't go back far enough
- this is where something like Ideal Parent Figure Protocol would be necessary
- or something else to get at ~18 month old attachment stuff
- this is probably my main hypothesis for what's going on
- which is fascinating when I consider I literally wouldn't have had this hypothesis a month ago - what else am I missing?
- was really helpful to hear Tim go through a whole IFS arc
- no individual pieces there were new, really, though some I'd forgotten about
- I don't think I've ever gotten through a full session