handshakes

> and sort of: the point is mostly not to predict one another's behavior at a holistic level (which I think is a mis-framing that decision theories incline toward), but instead to find enough shared structure to handshake on the things we care about

I'm thinking about TCP/UDP metaphors or SSL-esque metaphors

upgrading the bandwidth progressively, not assuming trust

(although maybe you don't come in assuming very low trust either. you come in with whatever is appropriate-to-context)

@DefenderOfBasic has a bunch of stuff on this