polarization

my experience doesn't contradict your experience!

my experience makes sense of my behavior!

unlike facts, or values, that can seem to be in direct conflict, my experience itself does not conflict with yours

my interpretation of it might contradict some interpretation of yours (or even imply you couldn't possibly have had an experience you know you had, which is a mess)

but the experience itself just exists and somehow needs to be reconciled with the relevance and significance of other peoples' experience

this is "of course you would do that"

cf "levels of reconciliation" tweet

there's a sense in which we all have the same set of objective facts, even if we disagree on what we are

whereas sharing a subjective reason gives plenty of space for you to say "oh of course you'd see it that way, given your experiences; I still don't really see it that way myself, given mine."

J. L. Kalla, D. E. Broockman, Reducing exclusionary attitudes through interpersonal conversation: Evidence from three field experiments. Am. Polit. Sci. Rev. 114, 410–425 (2020).