Instead of "X is Y", say "I can't tell the difference between X & Y"

September 6th, 2021

• Instead of "X is Y", say "I can't tell the difference between X & Y"
  • twitter.com/Malcolm_Ocean/status/1435042276762398723

May 23rd, 2021

• eg Instead of "X is Y", say "I can't tell the difference between X & Y"

Sequence on NNTD

• another is Instead of "X is Y", say "I can't tell the difference between X & Y", as a way to usefully engage with this bit, from either direction
  • When people experience this and it’s accompanied by major discomfort, they try to have the entirety of their experience validated by the person they’re experiencing it with, or someone else. However, because half of what’s happening—and possibly more than half of the meaning experienced by the dreamer—isn’t actually part of the scene as experienced by the other person, it’s hard for them to really validate it, especially when this involves taking responsibility for something they don’t experience any response-ability in relation to.
    • this is where it's key to have the validity of projection - it's not about you but it's not not about you
  • right, see, the validation is really important
    • “Over the course of therapy, I often reframe flashbacks as messages from the wounded inner child about the denied or minimized traumas of childhood. In this vein I paint flashbacks as the inner child righteously clamoring for validation of past parental abuse and neglect.”
    • and it's vital for untangling interpersonal stuff to have people taking a stance of validation towards each other, even when they don't know how to validate some specific content coming up, which this current write-up doesn't understand
      • it was written by a me who didn't understand this!

• Instead of "X is Y", say "I can't tell the difference between X & Y"
  • use the "they're the same picture" meme