as for what I mean by coercion, I'm still working on a write-up of this but my current best gloss is that coercion is "the exploitation of the scarcity of another, to force the other to behave in a way that you want"
so if people have a scarcity of food, you can coerce them by feeding them conditional on them doing what you want (this is usually called slavery, and requires you physically prevent them from feeding themselves any other way)
(in general, use of coercive strategies means preferring that the other continue to be generally in a state of scarcity, because otherwise you would be unable to continue to control them)
most people in our societies have a scarcity of money, and many jobs involve taking advantage of people having such scarcities, in order to get them to do whatever the boss wants them to do (to the extent the boss can actually measure this)
...it's pretty clear to me and I think to most people that this is pretty limited in how well it can motivate people to do anything remotely creative or hard to measure
this is to be contrasted with someone who is technically skilled and enjoys their work and has lots of job opportunities—such a person is somewhat immune to such exploitation because they can seek out self-directed work they would want to do anyway, rather than bending to serve someone else's will even though they don't enjoy it, because otherwise they'd starve
but by and large a lot of the coercion that occurs isn't with any readily-quantifiable resource like food or money, but rather with social regard: people feel a scarcity of social well-being, love, respect, and interpersonal okayness more generally, so others can control their behavior by withholding these social goods until/unless the person does what they want.
but again, use of such a coercive strategy requires that the person be in a chronic state of not-enoughness; otherwise you can't control them. this is incompatible with enlightenment and advanced stages with development, as far as I can tell, not to mention being at odds with overall health & well-being
meanwhile, people have other noncoercive motivations for wanting to do the sorts of things we think we need to coerce them into:
1. personally if I'm in a circle and someone points out that I'm doing something that's getting in the way of group coherence, then I want to untangle that for entirely selfish reasons: group flow is fucking ecstatic and wonderful and I want to experience it as much as possible
2. if someone I'm living with wants me to be quiet at night so they can sleep, then even though I love loud music and staying up late, I'm inclined to find a way to satisfy them (while also satisfying myself as much as possible) because I want them to be happy and I want them to enjoy living with me and my life is better to the extent that the people living with me are happy overall and glad to be living with me
and to the extent that my motivation is oriented towards actually making group flow work and actually making my housemate or partner happier, from intrinsic motivation, not just avoiding shame, then I'll be creatively attempting to actually find win-wins here, rather than goodharting, virtue signalling, and/or trying to avoid getting caught doing the thing people don't like