when others trust you and you don't trust yourself
No content on this page itself — see linked references below.
1 linked reference
January 18th, 2024
- neuroticism & gifts — this could also be headered under "when others trust you and you don't trust yourself"
- S > what do your clients, co-workers... think about the way you conduct your operation ?
- J > Haha, that's the worst part! It's all positive. Everyone says that they appreciate the way I do things, that I am brilliant in this regard, and that I have "a gift" for this type of work.
The conflict is entirely internal. I don't trust myself for some reason or another. I think the issue is knowing that I have limitations and wanting to be proactive about finding them and hedging against them rather than finding them through failure. - M > I've often found that these two go hand-in-hand, they're not a coincidence
part of the REASON others trust you is that you have a strong sense internally of wanting to be proactive about your limitations
I had a conversation with my wife about her nonprofit, where she was like "I feel like I'm letting my donors down, by not doing more stuff" but she's like, come up with a dozen potential strategies for solving mental health crisis care and clearly all of them won't work. and I'm like "literally your donors are paying you to be the sort of person who DOESN'T just pick a random solution that seems plausible. that's part of your genius."
if you see what I'm pointing at here, it may be possible for something to release—like if you see that the part of you that cares so much about this is going to keep caring about it, no matter what, then a kind of additional layer of neuroticism or worry may be able to relax (and maybe not) - J > yep. That tracks completely.
I really appreciate the insight. It sort of recontextualizes the neuroticism as a gift rather than a stumbling block.
It's whole idea of mutual arising phenomena. I wouldn't be feeling this way if I weren't in this position and I wouldn't be in this position if I wasn't the type of person who feels this way.
Seriously appreciate the perspective.