power-under

December 15th, 2020

• #thread on protectiveness & power-under dynamics
  • This thread may be *more* true for autistic people, but I think it is true for almost everyone: that at the times when others feel most threatened by us, we feel most vulnerable and afraid. And vice versa: those attacking us, on the inside, often feel profoundly powerless.
  • As a source, I'll share this book, whose basic thesis is about exactly this dynamic. People internalize powerlessness as kids, then as adults explode with dangerous rage *while feeling powerless*.
    
    The author figures this is what generates cycles of abuse.
    twitter.com/Malcolm_Ocean/status/1193425546681688064
  • The truth of this (and it's only a partial model - it probably doesn't, for instance, apply to sociopaths) is what underpins the way in which protectiveness doesn't actually work as a stance, because it produces/escalates Arms Race system dynamics.
    
    twitter.com/Malcolm_Ocean/status/1338544751163817984
  • AND! Protectiveness is not wrong, but necessary and sacred. What I'm saying here is not "be vulnerable" but "generate an internal strength that, over time, learns how it can be safe without being guarded."
    
    
    
    twitter.com/AskYatharth/status/1338213675811938304
  • The stance that I seek to embody instead is one that is profoundly respectful of all protectiveness.
    
    twitter.com/Malcolm_Ocean/status/1338428941116182528